Dealing With A Drunk, Sooo 2010.

I tried to avoid it. But as I am catching up on my blog reading I notice EVERYONE did a Halloween Post. So In the interest of following the crowd, I will too. I attended a party with my coworker/friend, her husband and David. We decided to dress as a theme together. First bet was the cast of the Jersey Shore but then decided to be gangstas and flappers from the 50's. Here is what they look like. Just so ya know.

Here is how we did it...

Whatcha Think? 
My job was having a kids party so I took the lil ones there and we headed over to the adult party. Last year David drove so he was not allowed to drink at all. This year I had a designated driver so he could drink. I made it clear to him that this party is my night. I mean if you've been following me you know that David has had his share of fun nights out over the past couple years. Me, I never go anywhere kid free. So this is my one time a year to let loose and have a few. Here is the problem. David also felt the need to let loose. He drank and drank and drank. Aftershock, Vodka, Tequila, Beer, Wine. everything! In the beginning we were both having a few drinks but then one of us, Ahem. decided to really have good time. He was on his best behavior at the party. But literally within 20 minutes of our exit it all went to hell in a handbasket. There was a drinking game at the party see..... 

Drinking games are  basically a way to binge drink. I played too but I cheated like hell. I  pretended to take shots. tehehehehe See we had to pick our kids up and although we did not have to drive, someone had to be of the conscience and sober mind to get them settled to bed. And once I saw party boy downing shot after shot, I sadly realized that someone would be me. Luckily he held it together at the party but soon as we left all that alcohol must have registered because David was SUPER ANNOYING! When you are sober nothing is worse than a drunk. Oh good lord he went from telling me that "I was not his mother" Which by the way, I pretty much am.... to telling me how much he loved me and appreciated me. It was 30 minutes of bitching about me to 30 minutes of praising me. He even felt the need to rehash his apologies for his behavior while we were separated. We had already put that baby to bed in July. I did not need the drunk verison. Uggh. And he would not shut up! Hour after hour. The worst part is he felt the need to be very close while he poured out his drunken heart. Like right up in my face close. So close the alcohol burned my eyes. Eventually he passed out. But the next day my bedroom reeked of alcohol. I  had to strip the linens, Febreeze the curtains etc. So I had an alright time but it would be nice to be the careless one sometime and not have to babysit him. Maybe next year. On the upside I got some great FB pics. But have you ever had to babysit a drunk? Oh god it is so annoying! I was supposed to be the one all toasty and shit but....

The Funeral....The Last Chapter

Work is as exciting as watching a battery charge, hence two posts in one day. Yippee!

Thought I'd finish up the funeral story.

After the burial there was a dinner sponsored by the Kiwanas club in honor of my grandfather he was a vietnam vet. We all arrived at the clubhouse in which it was to take place. The dinner was buffet style with the food and tables in the front room and a bar and restrooms located in the back.

Upon arriving the first thing my sister did was grab me and say "come on we are all taking a shot of Jack Daniels in honor of Grandpop".

I immediately knew this wouldn't go well so I nicely tried to decline. After being served up a quilt trip about not participating in the honorary shot that "all the grandkids would be be participating in"which I knew would probably turn into many shots I caved. As I approached the bar halfheartedly I noticed the only grandkids at the bar was...you guessed it..our family. So while my siblings were ordering shots I snuck away and dodged that event.

Then came time to eat. Our family secluded itself from the rest of the family and sat at a back table together. As I tried to avoid them one of my siblings waved me over informing me that they had saved a seat for me. Great! I sat down and we began to eat. The conversation quickly turned to the funeral and my sisters guest; her ex husband, a druggie and drunk, said extremely loud, (I'm sure due to the JD shots) "what the hell kinda service was that? I'm from the south! I'm used to some downhome organ music and soulful singing, what was up with all the bell ringing and humming?"

I immediatley tried to change the subject but it was to no avail he continued on and on and everyone was looking at us. I wanted to disappear.

Then my sister commented two or three times thatits fing hot in here. Well, sweetie its not really hot maybe again the JD shots so she deicded to go into the bathroom and remove her shirt leaving her in a cami. Not the kind of cami that you should wera in public. Keep in mind everyone else here has on their funeral attire. BVery formal stuff. She then kicked off her shoes at the dinner table and removed her bra from under the cami of course but nonethelss..

She doesn't look like this but this is what it felt like.

Eventually I made my rounds and apoligies and we decided to hit the road. To get as far away from the group as possible maybe Virgina. We head out to the parking lot where I encountered my ex brother in law smoking a joint while my sister raged on with accusations that my brothers GF had stolen her prescription pills from the console of her truck and they were bout to have it out. I made the quickest exit and droove fast as hell outta there.

The Funeral...Part 1

On April 15th this year my beloved grandpop passed. He lived in NJ. This is where the majority of my family is from and resides.

A little background here. My extended family are really classy upper-class people. They are all college educated, get married for life, homeowners, a close knit group people living the american dream.

Then there is the branch of the tree in which I groweth. My mom, marrried 6+ times to absuive men, an alocholic, she and each of my siblings has had their fair share of a rough life. Because we are in NC and everyone else is in NJ no one really knows how screwed up this section of our family is. Then there was the funeral.

It started with about 3 days of arguing, fighting, planning, replanning, etc etc..Who was riding with who, whose car would/wouldnt make it, who would stay with who, who could afford a hotel, who could not. There were several emotional breakdowns and arguments before we ever headed out.

So begins the journey to the North. They all arrived a couple days before me. I have little ones and shaved down my trip so I wouldn't be gone long. Upon my arrival at 10:45p at the Holiday Inn. I was greeted by this haggard looking bunch sitting outside all smoking. It was quite awkward since I hadn't seen or spoken to several of them in years although we all live @ 10 minutes apart. My estranged sister immediately hugged me and I hugged back....okay normal. Then came my mother. She grabs my hand and says simply "walk with me". Oh boy I thought. We walk a bit down the walkway and she begins to cry and tell me that it was my granpops dying wish that she and I made peace. Okay.

So begins all these dramatics and crying and hugging me and such. There is snot dripping from her nose onto my shirt as she clings to me with a death like grip.I try to normally tell her "it's okay mom, everything is fine, lets just focus on why we are here and not make this about us." This type of event goes on for about 20 minutes before I can finally convince her to rejoin the others.

So we begin our walk back and out of the blue she holds our arms to the sky and begins to yell "we did it daddy! We did it. You can rest now." She is extremely loud and making a spectacle of herself. I am horrified as everyone is watching this display.

She then tells me "Now you shout it Raquel"
Seriously? Uh No.
I tried to reason with her and said "Mom, Im sure he knows."
"No you gotta tell him. Scream it. Say look at us grandpop!"
No I will not.

This goes on for 5 minutes, her outburst in front of the hotel, my pleading that that is enough. Before I can break away. All this before I even check in.

Stay tuned to hear about the funeral..It gets so much better.