It's Mothers Day Jerks!!! Not Mother's Night.

So regular readers will know that I sent RA packing one week ago. Sticking with the theme of my life, which in case you don't know is "LIFE SUCKS" an avalanche of bad things came my way. My car broke down twice, my house was overrun with termites, twice, my cell phone broke, and after finally getting myself a new bed I discovered after 5 hours of trying to make it work,that it didn't fit. I spent my week muddling through one disaster after another. The plethora of it all was Mothers Day. Usually On Mothers Day I get showered with gifts, and tokens of kindness. I knew this Mothers Day would be a bit different because I was newly separated but I still had one ex husband and 4 kids to count on  right? Not to mention that the RA had spent a lot of time at my home that week helping me solve all the issues. So they all knew I was in serious need of some R & R.
The boys, all three of them, went to my ex husbands for the weekend. So it was just me and princess. I knew I would be a bit lonely and there is a coworker of mine that has invited me out several times and I always declined. So Friday night when she asked me if I wanted to do a girls day with her and her daughter for Mothers Day I happily accepted and began making plans. This coworker has a husband so I double checked to make sure they did not have plans. She told me he never does anything on Mother's Day. So we agreed to spend that day together just us and our lil girls.
Sunday morning I went on facebook and wished practically every mom I knew a great Mothers Day. And then enjoyed a quiet morning with princess all in anticipation for our girls luncheon. I picked out our prettiest dresses and ran our tub water. All morning I kept checking my phone for the barrage of texts, and voice mails, and faceboook posts wishing me a great Mothers Day...Nothing. Although a bit hurtful I decided not to let it get me down. I had plans, so no big deal. I sent a text to my luncheon date to confirm our time which was about an hour and a half away. She responded with this text 


"oh, I was wondering when you were gonna call. My husband surprised me this morning and he has made plans for us at 4pm"


Just so you know our luncheon time was 3pm. So I called her. I said to her "I don't understand are you canceling?" "No" she responded "I just have to be somewhere by 4pm." "Okay" I told her "how are we supposed to get seated, order, and eat, in under 30 minutes?" I was clearly annoyed. It would take me longer to get ready. She said it would be okay. I said "no, no thanks I would rather not drive 30 minutes out of my way to spend 20 rushed minutes at a restaurant,  just forget it." She could tell I was irritated so she tried to compromise. It was only 2pm she wondered if we could maybe meet closer to my home that way she would have more time. I agreed to that, but then I heard her confirming that with someone in the background. It was her husband! So I asked her is your husband coming? "Oh yes" she said. "Um, no, lets just cancel,  you enjoy your day with your family" I say. Why she wanted to know. Well it was supposed to be us girls only. "It's okay:" she said. "No, its really not". I said. "I just split from my guy after 12 years the last thing I wanted to do was have lunch with a happily married couple not to mention that my daughter would have to watch some other lil girl spending QT time with her daddy and surely that would remind her that her of her dad's absence." It was ll a lil too fresh. No thanks.


Let me say here that I am not hating on her. If my husband had showed up at 6am with gifts and plans for Mothers Day I would have blown her off too. But damn I would have called her before 30 minutes prior to our meeting time. That part I have to say made me pretty mad. No biggie I thought I'll just call one of my many other options to go out with. Well after calling several friends it appeared that everyone's husbands had stepped up to the plate and they were all having fun with their husbands and families. It was now 3pm. Then I thought if my sister who always has drama and has no man so I thought I would treat her and we would go out. Sure she would appreciate it I call her up. I say "hi is your Mothers Day sucking as much as mine?" "Yup" she says "well good then, wanna go to lunch, my treat?" "Oh I'm already going somewhere with Laura (our other sister)" she responds. "Oh" I say disappointed and waiting for them to invite me along. "Well I'll call you later" she says and hangs up. She didn't even say Happy Mothers Day. 

It's 3pm I have yet to receive a call or text from either of my boys or the dads. I am furious, fury quickly turns into pity as I sit in my rocking chair feeling alone and forgotten. I then decide I just wanna go to sleep. So princess and I put on a movie and cuddle up and that's where I stay until 6pm. At 6pm I get up. Still no messages. Okay I am no longer sad but greatly pissed off. How dare they? I cook, clean, do laundry everyday for these fools. I have financially, psychically and emotionally supported the RA all effing year and not even a call?#@!?@# Well fuck em all!

One of my friends called to check on me after her day of appreciation from her husband and she offered to go with me to dinner so we did . My boys did arrive home with gifts and they gave me a foot massage. But it was all a little too late. The day was ruined as far as I was concerned.

mothers day debate

I have 4 kids sometimes 6...long story. Anyhoo since I work with kids and have what sometimes feels like a zillion kids, every year I have this debate and wondered which side people would be on. My feeling is Mothers Day should be spent without the kids. For the love of god we have them 364 days a year so why is it special if we have them on the 365th day? Isn't it more special to not have them? I love my kids but a break from them I love too. If you really wanna thank me take the kids for the day. I find when you celebrate with them you are basically fulfilling your duties to them. Disciplining them, cooking for them etc. Even when the dad/husband says "its your day don't do anything" I find that doesn't mean that they will do it it just means: Relax, gather your strength.. let it all pile up until tomorrow then you can live a post-mothers day hell while you play catch up. My friends all think its wrong to wanna ditch the kids for mothers day but not me. However this year I found the perfect solution. Had breakfast and church with all the kids then they went with dad and I enjoyed the rest of my day alone......Cleaning,
So what do you think- is mothers day best celebrated with them or without them?

MARIA...WTF!!!

I am not one of those women who get my haircut every other month or obsess about the color/cut. I color at home and get a cut about twice a year, sometimes less. Well it was my kids decision to send me for a cut for mothers day. Sweet huh? Once I had the kids secured with an adult I decided to go on in. I had been having a particularly bad day as usual and really was excited to get some me time. I drove by a couple of our local salons and they were all packed. So I decided on my least favorite one, it too was packed but had several stylist and the shortest wait. As I sat in the lobby waiting for my turn I noticed that everyone checking in was requesting the same lady. I then noticed the lady who cut my hair last year, she was very sweet but did a terrible job. I wasn't too worried, I mean after all what was the odds of me getting her again?

After 20 minutes or so the manager and that lady(names Maria) stepped up to the checkin counter to discuss who was next and I heard Maria ask if she could go home. The assumed manager said "no, its way too busy." Mary politely explained that it was her day off and she had come in and had been there all day, she was tired and quite frankly just did not want to cut anther head.

I felt for Maria however I thought that conversation was completely inappropriate since we the customers were two feet away and heard the entire thing! The manager told Maria "just give me one last cut and then you can go." Maria smiled and said "ok but give me an easy one."

You guessed it....she got me! Damn!! I was immediately disappointed not only does Maria suck but she made it clear she did not want to cut anymore hair. I tried to think of a way to get out of it but could not think fast enough. Again let me say Maria is so nice. I reasoned that if she sucked that bad surely others would have complained and she would not still be here a year later.

Because I was stressed and irritated I paid extra for a hair wash. When you pay for a hair wash it is supposed to involve a head massage and a really good washing. Well Maria slapped some shampoo on my head and rinsed it right out. It took her about 1 min or less. My mood worsened as we headed over to the cutting chair. She asked what I wanted and lucky for me the girl cutting hair beside Maria had exactly what I wanted. Just cut off the dead ends and add lots of layers. I pointed out that the girl next to me had exactly what I wanted and since my hair was longer then hers she had lots to work with.

As I watched Maria switch scissors many times and really concentrate on cutting randomly throughout my head I felt that maybe she wasn't giving me what I wanted. I reminded myself that she was the stylist not me and maybe she was getting to the end result in her own way. 30 minutes later Maria shouted "beautiful! you're gonna love these layers!"

I looked in the mirror and did not see what she was referring to. She handed me a mirror and spinned me around to see the back as she went on and on about how fabulous it was, quite proud of herself. When she asked me if I liked the back I lied and said yes. I didn't see anything that even closely resembled what I had asked for but I gave Maria the benefit of the doubt. I thought maybe b/c it was wet I could not see it and once it dried I'd be as delighted as Maria was.

Well Im not. I hate it. I do not know what in the hell Maria did. I have some crazy style. The back of my head has one huge layer that flips out!!! WTF!! The front is angled and straight and the whole thing looks like some jester from the kings court a century ago. The worse part is its too short for me to go back and have someone fix it. AGGGHH

Maybe I'll post some pics of it so you all can have a good laugh.