When I was called back I was greeted by a "med student" that would be assisting in my care today. Great I thought. We did the preliminary stuff, weight, height etc. She then took me into the room to do the temp and blood pressure. She had no clue how to take my blood pressuue. She plugged in the machine and the nurse unplugged it. The student got up and plugged it back in and the nurse informed her that it need not be plugged in. She then fumbled with the arm cuff while she tried to figure out how to operate the thing. I was tempted to show her but refrained. I inquired about my urology referral and she looked through my file and said there is no referral in here. Once the actual nurse came back I inquired with her. She said the same. I told her that 3 months ago I had came here and the doc wrote me a referral for urology and I was supposed to get a call when it was scheduled. I reminded her that I had been there about 12 times over the course of a year for UTI's and the like. (and in case you missed those fun visits you can read about them here and here) She said just ask the doc.
The doc entered. One I had never seen before. She seemed nice enough. She too was pregnant. This is the third pregnant doc I had seen here. I wondered is this where they send docs to count down to their maternity leave? I asked her about the referral. She turned right to it and said "oh it's not scheduled yet." "Okay" I said "but its been 3 months. How long does it take?" "Dunno" she replied seeming completely uninterested and moved on. She asked me the basic questions periods, kids, birth control, etc. when she inquired about my general heath I went briefly over my history with the health department and told her I was having the same issues. She said "well your urine is fine." "Okay" I replied feeling defeated, "Well I also have a congestion that I fear may have turned into pneumonia or something can you check that out for me?" "Nope" she said "you are here for a pap." Shocked at her response while simultaneously deciding that I did not like her I explained to her again "I know I am here for that but I am sick and wondered if you could just take a listen to my lungs and tell me if I have an issue here." "No, that would be considered a sick visit and you are here for a pap." She says matter-of-factly. "I am aware of the reason I am here however I did not schedule an additional visit for the sick thing because I already had an appointment today and do not want to have to double pay or miss double work." She said "sorry, but you can schedule a sick visit when you check out today and then when you return we will listen to your lungs, and address any issues at that time." ????WTF???? Now I'm pissed. She asks me to get undressed. I do and then she says "do you want a breast exam?" "Shouldn't I have one?" I ask. "That's up to you" she responds. Rolling my eyes I say "yeah hook me up." She does and then proceeds with the pap.
Once she gets in there she immediately asks "have you ever had an abnormal pap?"
"Yes" I respond still mad about the sick thing
"When?" she asks
"When I was 18' I say
"And the results of that?"
"Everything was fine" I say
"How about more recently?" she asks
"Nope. nothing" I say trying to communicate with her as minimally as possible since I now have determined she is a bitch. She then asks for another swab from the nurse.
"Have you had an abnormal one recently?" she inquires
"Nope" I say.
"Not in the past ten years?" she asks.
"Nope" I respond thinking if this is her attempt at small talk, she sucks.
She then asks the nurse for another swab. This makes 3. "Hmm" she says as she's swabbing around in there. "
Never had an abnormal pap huh? Hand me another swab." This makes 4! Any woman knows the procedure is 2 swabs per pap. Between all the extra swabbing and abnormality questions I am getting concerned. "When was your last pap?" she asks. I wanted to say "damn bitch read my file will you" But I decide its not a good idea to talk ish when someone is in your vagina. "last year" I tell her.
"Okay you're done"
She then says "you can get dressed and we will notify you when the results come back abnormally, I mean if they come back abnormally."
"And the urologist?" I ask. "How long will I have to wait?"
"Give us a call in 3 weeks if you've not heard anything." She then hands me 3 sample pills from her pocket. Her demeanor is a bit nicer now after the pap? She tells me "you can have these samples they should help with the congestion until you can get back in for another visit."
She leaves the room and then another nurse enters and asks me if I want blood work done. "Aren't you supposed to get blood work done at your psychical?" I ask her I mean hell you are the people who keep stressing this is a psychical. "If you want it, if not then you don't have to?" the nurse tells me.
"I might as well get my moneys worth, hook me up" I tell her
I leave there worried about what the hell she saw during the pap that would cause the barrage of questions and the two extra swabs. The next day I get 3 calls from them. Please keep in mind that this office usually won't even return a call when you are on your death bed. So getting a call from them scared me. The nurse informs me that my cholesterol is too high. This info was provided by the optional blood testing. Good thing I said yes. I breathe a sigh of relief. I thought they were calling to say something much worse. She tells me diet and exercise and hangs up. An hour later I get a "follow up call" from another nurse?
Then that afternoon I get yet another call from the receptionist just calling to reassure me she is working on my referral but it may be May before they make any progress. Sure I say. Okay so now I'm totally freaked. It seems as though they saw something and are now realizing that maybe I was not just complaining for fun for the past couple years and they are now covering their tracks. What do you think? Am I being paranoid or are my concerns legit?
