Monday, February 21, 2011

Bob Rocks at Home Depot

Saturday night, among other adventures I had to venture over to Home Depot at 8:30p. When I enter Home Depot it is obvious to anyone that I am not the hardware store type. I had my son with me and we had been going at it since bright and early and were exhausted but really needed some floor adhesive. (we are redoing our dining room) We entered the huge mega hardware store clueless. There was a "customer service" desk immediately to my left with three people behind it. One was one the phone (cell phone that is) and the other two were just standing there looking bored. I approached the desk and stood there patiently waiting for them to stop conversing and acknowledge me. They carried on as if I was invisible. I stood there another  two minutes. Granted two minutes is not very long but when there are three people being paid to assist customers and I was the only customer it actually was way too long. I cleared my throat and they carried on. So then I said "excuse me." The one lady carried on with her convo and then then finally the younger lady said "Can I help you?"
I replied "Yes, I am looking for floor adhesive." She looked dumbly at me and said "Oh, I don't know." Then the guy piped in and said with a smart ass smirk "ummm, its in the flooring section". 'Thank you. smart ass." I replied silently. I then asked "Can you tell me where that might be?" 'It's in the back of the store' he replied matter-of-factly. Uggh what an ass I thought. "Can you give me a hint if it's on the right, the left, the center?" I asked annoyed. I mean come on the back of home depot is pretty large. "I believe its aisle #30" he says. "Thanks so much for all your help" I reply sarcastically and stomp off to aisle 30.
About midway there I encounter this weird looking, older gentleman with a Home Depot smock on.
This is not really Bob, Just an actor portraying Bob.
 He is pushing an empty cart and whistling. I smiled as I pass him. He stops and says to me "Hey there. Need some help?" "Nope, I said "I am just looking for floor adhesive." "Oh well I can take you to that" he says with a smile.
"Oh that's okay, Bob" I say noticing his name tag, "the lovely people up front already told me that it was on aisle 30." Bob rolls his eyes and says "awe come on I'll take you there, I insist." So he does. Remember now I just wanna get my ish and go home its late and I'm tired. I have $300 groceries in my trunk that needed to be put away and a floor to  lay all before bed. Bob begins going over all the adhesives and what the differences are. "Thanks Bob, I say I 'll just take this one and be on my way." "Well what are you doing exactly?" he asks "Well Bob, I am......"
I explain all the plans to him. "Oh well  do you have a R57H?" "What the hell is that Bob?" I ask
"Oh it's a tool that is needed to spread the adhesive properly." Not sure I quickly call David and he says no we do not have one. So I pick one and try to move on. Bob spends 15 more minutes sharing his flooring stories with me. He is quite endearing but I gotta go. I say "thanks for your time Bob but we'll be on our way." He then suggests we go look at some trim because I'll be needing that too. He asks me a series of questions that sound like a foreign language to me as he tries to determine what type of trim I needed. I sigh. I have no clue. I call David again and he says we don't need trim right now. So I tell Bob that and  he says "well you will eventually, so let's go take a looksy and determine what you ll need to save you time later."  I need to save time now Bob I think. We head on over and Bob gives me a lesson on all the trim types. Thanks Bob. While Bob is helping us his radio is going off people need him and it sounds urgent, other workers are calling out to Bob from other aisles requesting his assistance. I say to Bob "you can go Bob. They need you. We are fine." "No, no, they can wait. I am already helping you." He replies with a smile. The interruptions are numerous while random shoppers and staff approach Bob to ask him questions. He makes them all wait while he finishes up my trim lesson. I finally break away and head up to check out. At check out I am greeted by a lovely lady named Maria. She too is very helpful. She asks me if I enjoyed my visit to Home Depot. I tell her at first no, and I suggest replacing the yahoos working at customer service she smiles and says "yes, we have some real attitudes up there." I then tell her how wonderful Bob is. And that I appreciate her kindness as well.  She hands me a website to go comment on and I sure am going to. 
But I just thought that although Bob turned a 10 minute visit into an hour one he should get some homage here. Bob you Rock!


  1. Whenever I got Home Depot I NEVER ask anyone younger than me for help. I always look for the middle aged guy who has that "handy man" look and ask him. No matter what you're doing or need, he'll be able to help.

  2. Yeah Bob! See we old @#$% do rock and I can't get a job why?

    My dad was a master plumber and applied for a job there when he retired. They told him he had to apply online. Of course the old coot was intimated and left. He was too embarressed to tell my mom. (he was like 74 at the time) He came home and said he applied at Wal-Mart instead as a greeter and they hired him on the spot. Now when he goes to Home Depot and he hears the "young punk" (his words) tell a customer the wrong thing he has been known to walk them around the store and tell them what to do and what they need. It cracks me up.
    So Bob and my Dad sound a lot alike.