He's Tryna Sabotage Me

I didn't plan on sharing this but now it has become necessary. I am trying to eat better. Not a diet per se, but eat better. I have the worse eating habits. I basically live on cereal,  mac n cheese, sweet tea, coffee, and bagels with tons of cream cheese. I cook 6 out of 7 days and even then I will eat cereal after feeding the kids?  I have noticed that most of my clothes are getting a bit snug and I'll be damned if I will go up another size so I'm doing what I can.


Okay- now heres theTMI part. I am taking a colon cleanse too. Never done this but after hearing one million other people talk about all the stuff that gets stuck in your colon. I thought why the hell not? I'm not doing a super fast, stay by the toilet kinda cleanse. But yet a more slower, calmer  cleansing. 14 days to  be exact. Here's what I'm trying.                                              

So now that you ave all the facts lets bring it full circle. I am doing quite decent for me. Instead of snacking on candy bars and soda, I'm eating fruit. Instead of cheeseburgers, I'm having salad and lean sandwiches. etc, And suspended are the days that I scarf down half a box of cookie crisp before bed. Notice I said suspended not gone. Just keeping it real. I would say my worse habit is bedtime. I LOVE to throw down at midnight. Yes I know its bad for you blah, blah, blah,. But seriously there is nothing like enjoying some yummy stuff while the house is quiet the kids are all in bed (no sharing) and I'm watching my favorite shows. So I'm making small changes everywhere else but am trying to kill the whole bedtime bingeing that I do.


I have done a pretty good job for a week and yesteday just to keep myself from temptation, I allowed the kids to have cereal for dinner. Yes, I said it.. cereal for dinner. Happens around there about once every two months when I am in a "fuck it" mood. I was not in "fuck it" mood yesterday but if I had cooked the steak fajitas that I had taken out earlier that day for dinner I would have eaten 4 of them and regretted it so cereal it was. They had cereal I had a banana. And to make certain I wouldn't get hungry before bed I decided to go to bed early before the hunger set in. 


When RA arrived home he asked what was for dinner and I told him to choose a banana or cereal. He didn't like that too much but too bad too sad. I told him we had left over cabbage and sausage in the fridge he could eat. Then I crashed out. I was snoozing away. At 1045p RA woke me up with a huge plate of Filet Mignon and 4 eggs loaded with cheese. Damn, Damn, Damn. "I am on a diet!" I snapped. 
"Oops I forgot" he said "I can throw it out"
"No the hell you cannot throw that out, I'll just eat half".
Well half turned into all as usual. 
I swear it was the best food ever. The filet was so spicy and tender and juicy and uugghh anyways. I polished it off and feeling like a loser I explained to him that he would need to be a bit more supportive. Guess you don't want these then...he pulled 5 Worlds Finest chocolate bars from his pocket! If you do not know about WF chocolate it is the old school candy bars that schools used to sell back in the day and they are AWESOME and I hadn't had one in about 8 years. 



Damn him. I ate one square and that was all. I am gonna try  to unload the others on the kids this weekend before I make make any more mistakes.