Wednesday, September 29, 2010

PART 2- The Dog

So it's after 10p Friday night. RA despite my objections is on the way home with a puppy he found on the highway. I am in a panic. Because its late and I already had to deal with the  neighbor and 4 teenage boys, plus two other kids and I do not wanna fight but I also really do not want a stray dog running around my house for all the reasons I posted here. I call my friend who has helped me with my past animal issues and she says to me"Lock him out!" "Whatever you do do not let him in with that dog!" I begin to run through the house locking all the doors but then it occurred to me that if he knocked the kids would let him in and we had company, so maybe a lockout wasn't such an appropriate idea. So I decided to stand out in the middle of the road and stop him before he entered our driveway.

Although for a moment I thought he was gonna run me over. I played it real tough, didn't even flinch. He stopped his car in the middle of the road, got out handed me 4 pizza boxes and got back in his car and simply went around me, pulled into the driveway and got out. I said "is there a dog in that car?"
"Sure is" he said
"Well Do not bring that dog into the house. If you try I will be forced to get into a psychical altercation with you and you will call the cops on me and I will go to jail  in front of my kids and their friends and they will forever be traumatized thanks to you and that dog."
He rolled his eyes and I went in, He stayed out.

We have a walk out deck/gazebo on the back of our house. I peered through the windows to see that he was setting up house for the doggy on the porch. No! Its a porch not a dog house! As long as the dog did not come in and spread fleas all over my  house I guess I could live for now.

He thinks I don't know but he snuck the dog in and gave him a bath in my bathtub. Gross! But he waited until 3am to do it when I was fast asleep. But I still know. I always know. The next morning I awoke to all my kids sitting out on the porch playing with the dog. That's when I noticed it was a Pitt Bull aka eat-your-kids-face-off kinda dog. The dog was growling at people and acting a fool so I reminded RA that the dog needed to go today. 

He loaded up the puppy and headed out. 6 hours later he returned. I assumed he had gotten rid of the dog. He portrayed that he had. But then I saw the puppy running around out back! 
Fuck! Are you kidding me? I began to go off again but he swore he had someone coming to get the dog in a few days. Bullshit! While we were out arguing the two boys from the previous night walked up heard us arguing and then asked me if they could have the dog. I said "hell yeah!" I asked if their mom would go for it and they said yes she loves strays. I could not have been more happy! I packed that pup up so quick and they headed away. I felt good. Two teenage boys would be the perfect home for the dog and the dog was gone. Yahoo!! 

RA saw me packing the dog up and started saying  "you cant just get rid of my dog!" 
"My dog?!?!? I thought it was for the kids. And I thought you were getting rid of the dog liar!" "I knew it!" I said "if your mystery dog retriever shows up before these boys make it to the stop sign then you can give him away other that that delay is done." 

I felt super satisfied. Ran me a bubble bath, pured a glass of wine and settled in the tub finally able to relax about that dog. Just as I lowered by body into the lavish bubbles...DING DONG!

Stay tuned to see who's at the door.


  1. Is it the creepy old neighbor lady?

  2. Aaaaah, no fair! Who is at the door!
    Well, I hope the tub was cleaned before you sank into it!

  3. Take the dog to the vet and have it checked for a chip. Someone may be looking for it.

  4. Watchman & Sandra- Well you will just have to wait for that.

    Mike- Are you kidding me? You will have to read the next post to see why this is not a good idea.

  5. Did you run your bubble bath in the same tub that they gave that many mutt a bath?

  6. Doc- Yes after cleaning it out of course. I have been checking for fleas ever since.

  7. Onto part, maybe you should kick RA out and keep them dog! LOL!